Wednesday, September 24, 2008

My first speeding ticket...

So I have always been a little bit of a lead foot when it comes to driving. Usually I keep it pretty under control. Well today I seem to have gotten carried away a bit. I was at work and was getting ready to leave when I got into a really good gospel discussion with my boss. I decided the best thing to do would be to stay and answer her questions. Mind you, I was a little pressed for time because I needed to go home and cook dinner for the missionaries at 5:30. I continued the conversation as the minutes rolled by. Finally at 4:45 I decided I had to leave or these poor boys would have to wait for me to cook and it would take forever. So as I was driving home I had to go over this big hill. I drive a tiny Chevy Aveo, getting that thing to go up hill is like trying to move a brick with your pinkie. It can happen but it takes lots of push to make it happen. Either way I'm in a little bit of a rush so I'm flooring Lil Ricky (yes I named my car) to make it over the hill. As I reach the top I think to myself, it feels like I'm going really fast. Before I could do anything about it I look over the top of the hill... and there he is, like a hunter waiting for his next kill. I saw the gun, I knew this kid was locked and ready to chase me down. He pulled out of the parking lot and started to follow my car, didn't even turn on his siren. I just knew I was guilty. I looked for a space to pull over. We were on a busy street and for the safety of the cop I turned into a residential area. And this is how the conversation goes

*keep in mind, I was scared to death, this was the first time anything ever happened to me. I was shaking uncontrollably while searching for the papers I needed. Freaked out that my dad was going to kill me. So many thoughts running through my mind*

The cop approaches:
C: hey how are you doing today
S: good
C: do you know why I pulled you over?
S: I'm going to guess speeding?
C: Ha, Yeah. Do you know how fast you were going?
S: um... Not really.
C:I clocked you at 57. Do you know what the speed limit is?
S:Yeah, its 35.
C:Yeah, You were going WAY to fast. K. So I am going to have to write you a ticket.
C:Are you a Mom? ( He saw the car seat in the back of my car from the nanny job)
S:No, I'm just a nanny. I just got off work and I was in a little hurry to get home.
C:I was going to say, You look to young to be a mom.
*looks down at the girl about to hyperventilate*
C:Is this your first ticket?
S:Yeah
C:Is this your first time being pulled over?
S:Yeah, and I'm trying really hard not to cry and look like a pansy.
C:ha ha, alright well just take a deep breath. These are the papers I need, so Ill be right back.

* cop goes to his bike and write the horrible ticket, and returns*

C:So Miss. Murray. blah blah blah this is your ticket. blah blah blah. These are the steps you need to do to take care of it, I just need your signature right here.
S:Alright, thanks. (who thanks the cop who just wrote them a fatty ticket?!)

* I sign the stupid thing, and this is where I have finally calmed down enough to be funny. Almost tempted to take a picture with the cop to save in my scrapbook*

S:Ya know, you have really nice teeth.
C:Thanks, You do too.
S:Thanks, I never had braces.
C:Wow, really? I had braces and lots of dentist problems.
S:Yeah, well I guess we all cant be that lucky all the time.
C:Yeah, well I race dirt bikes and motorcycles and stuff like that so Ive chipped my front teeth like 6 times.
S:Wow, your a trooper. That's intense.
C:Yeah, I know a really good dentist.
S:Ha, I'm dating a really good dentist.

C;Alright Miss Murray, you have a good day.
S:Thanks you too.

*and as I drive away I wave like an idiot*

Ya know. My I didnt pull anything, nothing sexual in any way, no humor, no nothing. I was in such shock that I froze. Im my world I would have been wearing a mini skirt and a low cut shirt, Given the cop the sexy face and he would have let me go. But NOOOOO.... I get to get pulled over wearing a jack johnson T-shirt. baggy jeans, no make up and hair in a messy bun. I still believe if I was dressed up, I would have gotten out of it.

Moral of the story: don't feed the missionaries, they only cause you trouble. They ended up being 20 minutes late so I raced home for nothing. UGH! And if you are going to speed anyways, at least make sure you are wearing a mini skirt and you look hot.

No comments: